Bad Naughty Mama! How Not to Be a Sexy Mama…

Oooh, I let the man have it today. For the sake of keeping his ass in check, I let him have it.

This used to be a common occurrence. He’d do something to ever so slightly offend me, I’d talk shit to him, he’d back down to get me to shut the hell up, I’d talk more trash, he’d finally fight back, we’d have it out, and finally, we’d fuck each other’s brains out to make up. So very exciting.

Until we both ended up as emotional puddles of crap on the floor.

So we live and learn. Now I pick my battles much more wisely, as in, I only rip people new ones on the Internet because that’s what’s really important. I kid. No, I pick my battles with the man. There’s nothing more unattractive and sexy than a naggy wife or girlfriend. You can be as hot as Ms. Hawt and Bothered, and it still gets old after a while. Can I get a hell yeah?

This battle was over habits of the spending variety. As in, the man is constantly losing nail clippers and razors and such and turning around faster than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest to buy replacements. So you say, “Ah, it’s just $12.” Um hmmmm. Times 7 times in one month.

Now, even that ends up being less than $100…but. Aw fuck it, who knows. That was just my battle this week, okay?

So I verbally kicked his ass over the phone. Then we made up. Tonight we will talk about it and hopefully grow from it. Mission accomplished. Man in check. Does Hawt and Bothered need to check herself?

What do you naughty bitches think? How often and about what do you pick on your man? Do you wait for the proverbial camel’s back to break, or do you employ a constant nag, a la Chinese water torture?